New posting in 2012

MasyaAllah...it has been ages since I last posted in this blog! This couldn't be happen again. As promise to you, my children...this is suppose to be my notes and thoughts for you guys.
Anyway, how times fly. I am no longer with Proton. Already 9 months passed since the last day I was there. Now I am doing the same thing as I did, but in a university. So far so good. Life could not be more fair to me. Yes..there are some things that still bugging me, but alhamdulilah still bearable.

Sarah is waiting for her SPM result. Hanim is already in MRSM Taiping. Hafiz will be sitting for UPSR this year while Ali is already in Y3. I am still overweight:-) En. Suami pun still 'macam tu lah'.


So here we are...
Will keep posting new entry this time around.

Ibu,
UniKL 2012.

Wesak day with my family

Just spend time with my adik2 and their family at my place...

Next plan is to have a family picnic at janda baik...

TTFN.

In between jobs

What do you do when you are on leave for a month?

I have so many things that I want to do, but so lazy to kick start it. It's just one lazy day to another.

I'll try something again this evening...

TTFN.

Rindunya Pada Bapak

These were the days that we spent makan ikan bakar kat Tanjung Dawai. Guess it was the last trip before Bapak tak boleh bangun langsung.

Miss you so much....

Rindunya pada Bapak: Hafiz

Dear Abang,

These are all the photos that we took during the last hari raya that we celebrated with Wan.

You were his first grand son. I remembered that he came all over from Kedah with Atok to accompany me to the hospital the day you were born (delivered you thru C-section, so we basically know when you are coming:-)).

Remember he asked you to recite the Yassin? Yes... that's Wan. He sure loved you very, very much.

Let's keep his memories alive.

AlFatihah...

Rindunya pada Bapak: Ali dengan Bapak

April datang lagi. This year will mark the 3rd year of not having you

with us. You will know what need to be done when I am having such a bad day. I miss you so much.

Ni gambar-gambar yang ada dalam my simpanan masa arwah still can sit and talked to us (Cik gu Ali and Ali).

Need to still talk about Bapak, or else all memories will be gone...

To Ali, we named you after the man himself. He was quite surprised to know that Abah named you Ali, but deep inside I get the feelings that he kind of like the idea of having an Ali Jr.

With that, Ibu hope you'll grow up to be the man like my Bapak used to be.

Bapak kissing Ali.

He likes to use selimut eventhough it's noon...

Ali malu-malu degna bapak masa nak ambil gambar...

This was actually his last year of hari raya way back in 2008. Tak menyesal balik that year...

Thanks Bapak for all the love you shown to us. Al-fatihah.

Salam 2011

It has been ages since I last update this blog. Sorry mu babies as I am so overwhelmed with work and all the that is happening around me lately. I do hope that once Ibu in the new place, I can start writing in this blog again on a regular basis... Yes... I am quiting PROTON for the 2nd time. Anyway, please doa that I will advance myself at the new place. Jauhilah ibu dari fitnah... Wassalam...

Masak Lemak Cili Api

Dear anak-anak,
It's has been ages since I visited this site. Now that you guys can access to my site, starting from today, I'll try to upload recipes for your compilation again.

Cogratulations Sarah for trying out Masak Lemak Cili Api Ketam last weekend. It's not that difficult to cook right? Hope you can graduate to try other masak lemak using the same base and method...

Let's recap the recipe....

Recipe #1: Ketam Masak LEmak Cili Api

Bahan-bahan:
1 kg Ketam - bersihkan and tos kasi kering
1 kotak (200ml) santan segera

Bahan2 kat bawah nie diblender:
10 ulas bawang kecik
4 ulas bawang putih
2" halia
1/2" kunyit hidup
15 tangkai cili api - kalu nak lagi pedas letak lebih

3 btg serai - dititik
1 helai daun kunyit - dimayang (tapi mase masak nie lupe nak letak)
2 keping asam gelugor - cuci kasi bersih
Garam dan gula secukupnye
Nenas dalam tin + airnya...

Cara Memasak:
1. Tumis bahan2 yg dah dikisar hingga wangi dan naik minyak.
2. Masukkan serai & daun kunyit, pastu kacau2 sekejap.
3. Masukkan santan kotak & tambah air ikut kepekatan yg kite suke. Jangan lupe kacau sekejap2 kasi sebati (kalu gune santan kotak tak payah dok selalu kacau kuah tu, sbb dia tak kan pecah santan)
4. Lepas dia dah mendidih masukkan ketam diikuti asam, garam & gula secukupnye.
5. Tunggu dia menggelegak lagi, rase sikit kuahnye kalu ade yg tak cukup tambah ikut tekak masing2.
6. Dah siap, hidangkan dgn nasi panas

Bahan-bahan:
1 kg Ketam - bersihkan and tos kasi kering
1 kotak (200ml) santan segera - eryne biase gune santan harmuni

Bahan2 kat bawah nie diblender:
10 ulas bawang kecik
4 ulas bawang putih
2" halia
1/2" kunyit hidup
15 tangkai cili api - kalu nak lagi pedas letak lebih

3 btg serai - dititik
1 helai daun kunyit - dimayang (tapi mase masak nie lupe nak letak)
2 keping asam gelugor - cuci kasi bersih
Garam dan gula secukupnye
Air ikut kepekatan kuah

Cara Memasak:
1. Tumis bahan2 yg dah dikisar hingga wangi dan naik minyak.
2. Masukkan serai & daun kunyit, pastu kacau2 sekejap.
3. Masukkan santan kotak & tambah air ikut kepekatan yg kite suke. Jangan lupe kacau sekejap2 kasi sebati (kalu gune santan kotak tak payah dok selalu kacau kuah tu, sbb dia tak kan pecah santan)
4. Lepas dia dah mendidih masukkan ketam diikuti asam, garam & gula secukupnye.
5. Tunggu dia menggelegak lagi, rase sikit kuahnye kalu ade yg tak cukup tambah ikut tekak masing2.
6. Dah siap, hidangkan dgn nasi panas

Recipe # 2: Ayam Masak Lemak Cili Api

The specialty from Negeri Sembilan is the masak lemak cili padi, which is a spicy rich yellow coconut gravy that is cooked with bird's eyes chillies. While this dish uses chicken, it can be substituted with prawns or a firm white fish.

Ingredients:

500 g chicken, cut into small pieces

1 teaspoon salt

2 pieces asam keping (dried tamarind slices)

1 cup (250ml) thick coconut milk

2 cups (500ml) thin coconut milk

1 turmeric leaf

Salt and pepper to taste

Spice Blend:

20 bird's eyes chillies

2 cm ginger

2 cm tumeric root

8 shallots

2 cloves garlic

Preparation method:
1. Rub the chicken pieces with salt and let marinate for 10 minutes.

2. Blend all the spice ingredients until fine. Stir in the ground ingredients with asam keping, torn tumeric leaf and thin coconut milk into a pot and bring to a slow boil.

3. Add chicken pieces and simmer until the gravy thickens. Add thick coconut milk and salt to taste.

So, if you guys wants to cook masak lemak telur or daging, you can use these as the base.

Enjoy...

Ibu

Happy Birthday to me!

Alhamdulillah... I am 44 today. Kalau bapak ada sure pagi2 lagi dah dapat call from him, but this year, lagi teruk... no one from the office even remember my birthday! Only MN jer yg wish me thru email. Hopefully she is sincere lah.
Tak per lah... I am making my plan to move out from this company. I couldn't bear the fact that people hate me for what I do not what I am guilty of. What a mental torture....But then, why should I back-off? Why should I let them bully me like that!

Anyway, semuga Allah kuatkan semangat untuk menjadi ibu dan anak yg soleh....
Wassalam.

P/s: Guess my officemate memang benci I that much... I just do not know what my sins are!

Ramadhan Datang lagi

Assalamualaikum,

I am a little late in updating the blog, but what can I say. Moving to GHR is like a dream, everything is needed all at once! I am like running my a*& off to get what the bosses want. Believe it or not, I am handling the job evaluation exercise for the long overdue promotion & upgrading. The schdule with the kids were quite disrupted as compared to the time when I was in GICT.

Anyway, Ali managed to fast from day 1. He missed the 2nd day, but so far he is OK. He is also officially 6 on the 25th August. We took him to Baskin Robbins to celebrate. How times fly!!

Other than that, I did not managed to cook that much this year. Dah 3 kali clock out from ofiice at 6:30pm! I guess these are the moments that I really need support from my family to understand my career life...

Will keep you posted more, especially the food that we have...

Lastly, May Allah bless my family during this ramadhan. Ramadhan kali ni very much different since Bapak kembali. Tabahkan hati kami sekeluarga. To JJ, hope he will change once and for all. Life is so short to be so 'berdendam' and 'mengungkit'. Just admit your mistakes & change your self. Don't blame others the things that you do....

As for Sarah, hope she will be ready for the PMR coming soon...

Wassalam.
p/s: entry from my living room.

Back to HR & Hanim hospitalized

Sorry for not updating in long time. Many things happen, plus can't get the connection from home! Apalah Celcom...

Updates:

1. I am now back to GHR... looking after OD. The last 3 weeks marks my having to solat maghrib at the office. What have I got myself into??? Anyway, I get my reason for that move. I do not feel at home in IT. I did my part in having the RFP out and went thru the selection process, but I do not feel connected to the project. Susah nak jadi BPIM in an environment that don't really appreciate BPIM role. Anyway, thanks to Zam and Halim for making it bearable...

2. Apparently I came in to OD when we are in the process of group re-structuring! Crash course in Job Evaluation after 2 hours of report duty! I know it's difficult working for Pn Hasnah, but I just want to get myself involve in HR Strategy to ensure that I still can work anywhere after this. Teruk kan? Well... I need to chart my own course. Tak kan nak jadi Manager till I retire...

3. On top of all the hustle & bustle of my HR life, Hanim pulak hospitalized. Her platelet drop to 88 last Sunday. Get her admitted to SDMC. Left her alone yesterday since Rozita wants me to complete the GHR Org Structure and the deployment letters. Sampai office, Rozita was on MC. I was alone 'battling' Hasnah's request. I feel bad for not being there for Hanim. Kena pulak JJ pun ada presentation (in case you wonder what happen to the father). Guess Allah knows the best. Alhamdulillah, she can handle herself quite well. Then today, I decided to be at the hospital and be with her to meet the Dr. Lee. Maybe we can go home after this, depending on her blood result this morning.... not dengue, only a very bad viral infection. Alhamdulillah...

4. I might take the day off. Pergi sekolah Ali & register him for Standard 1 next year. Pergi facial? I really need it! We'll see cam na...

Ta-ta for now.
Bye.

p/s: kalau bapak ada sure dia pagi-pagi akan call. Then he'll call every other hour. I miss him badly. Love you always, bapak.

Happy Birthday Hanim!

Dear Hanim,

Come 13th July will marks your 13th birthday. As your mother, Ibu wish all the best for you. With that I want to share this song with you...

My Wish
by Rascal Flatts

I hope the days come easy and the moments pass slow,
and each road leads you where you want to go,
and if you're faced with a choice,
and you have to choose,
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.
and if one door opens to another door closed,
I hope you keep on walkin' 'til you find the window,
if it's cold outside,
show the world the warmth of your smile,
but more than anything,
more than anything,
My wish, for you,
is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
your dreams stay big,
your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
and while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you,
and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
I hope you never look back,
but you never forget,
all the ones who love you,
in the place you left,
I hope you always forgive,
and you never regret,
and you help somebody every chance you get,
Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,
and always give more then you take
But more than anything,
Yeah, and more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
and while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you,
and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
your dreams stay big,
your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
and while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you,
and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
this is my wish
i hope you know somebody loves you may all your dreams stay big...

Happy Birthday my baby...
Love,
Ibu.

Birthday Emak

Tomorrow is Emak 63rd birthday. This mark her birthday without Bapak by her side. Mesti sedih sangat. They were always together for the last 44 years...going thru all the ups and downs. There's so many thing that I want to give her. I wish I can take back all the things that happened in her life. I wish I can roll back the clock.... but then it is only wishful thinking!

Dear Emak,
Ampunkanlah dosa-dosa anak mu ini. Halalkanlah makan dan minum selama ini. Doakanlah kesejahteraan anak2 mu serta cucu2mu. Ya Allah, panjangkanlah usia Emak dan semuga kami dapat bersama-sama menjadi tetamuMu secepat mungkin. AMin.



Ibu
Artist: P. Ramlee

Ibu,ibu
Engkaulah ratu hatiku
Bila ku berduka
Engkau hiburkan selalu
Ibu , ibu
Engkaulah ratu hatiku
Tempat menyatakan kasih
Wahai ibu
Betapa tidak hanya engkaulah
Yang menyniari hidupku
Sepanjang masa engkau berkorban
Tidak putusnya bagai air lalu
Ibu, ibu
Engkaulah ratu hatiku
Tempatku menyerahkan kasih
Wahai ibu...

Dear Emak,
I love you always.
11/7/2009... blogging from Jalan Kebun... Thanks JJ for the broadband.

Thinking of You

Lately I have been thinking of someone. This person used to be a very important person in my life especially when I was living in the States. We knew each other when we were doing our English preparation classes in SMS Selangor some 20++ years. He (ooops.. yes its a HE) was (and still is, I hope) my best pal. Our friendship is so platonic and crazy. I argued a lot with him, which made me feel very much at ease with him. I knew almost all of his love relationship, and he will get the reviews of my latest crush! I will not reveal his name considering all the circurmstances ( he probably dah beranak-pinak and happily married).
Listening to Katy Perry's Thinking of You really makes me think of you.

Thinking Of You
[ Katy Perry Lyrics are found on www.songlyrics.com ]

Comparisons are easily done
Once you've had a taste of perfection
Like an apple hanging from a tree
I picked the ripest one
I still got the seed
You said move on
Where do I go
I guess second best
Is all I will know
Cause when I'm with him
I am thinking of you
Thinking of you
What *you* would do if
You were the one
Who was spending the night
Oh I wish that I
Was looking into your eyes
You're like an Indian summer
In the middle of winter
Like a hard candy
With a surprise center
How do I get betterOnce I've had the best
You said there's
Tons of fish in the water
So the waters I will test
He kissed my lips
I taste your mouth
He pulled me in
I was disgusted with myself
Cause when I'm with him
I am thinking of you
Thinking of you
What you would do if
You were the one
Who was spending the night
Oh I wish that I
Was looking into...
You're the best
And yes I do regret
How I could let myself
Let you go
Now the lesson's learned
I touched it I was burned
Oh I think you should know
Cause when I'm with him
I am thinking of you
Thinking of you
What you would do if
You were the one
Who was spending the night
Oh I wish that I
Was looking into your eyes
Looking into your eyes
Looking into your eyes
Oh won't you walk through
And bust in the door
And take me away
Oh no more mistakes
Cause in your eyes I'd like to stay...


What if I can turn back the clock? Back to 20 years ago. My life will definitely not be the same.
I wish that I can talk to him now, just to say hi! There are many things left unspoken....

But is it a good move?

Anyhow, I miss you, my friend. May Allah bless you with all the happiness that you desired. Hopefully you are one of the best husband and father to all your kids...

Breakfast Menu

Assalamualaikum,

This year marks my attempt to make you guys to start your day with home-cooked breakfast i.e. bawa bekal to school. We started off with nuggets but eventually we settled for sandwich--> pocket sandwich, grilled cheese sandwich, left-overs chicken & lamb sandwich etc.

Menu 1: Pocket Egg sandwich

What do you need:

2 eggs

1/2 cup of Milk (if available)
1 dallop of chilli sauce

1 tspn butter

dash of black pepper

Cheddar cheese slices

Bread

How do yo do it:

A. Make your scrambled eggs

1. Beat eggs and the chilli sauce till combine. Add the black pepper

2. Heat butter. Pour in the eggs combi.

3. Let it cuddle for a sec, then scramble it.

4. It's done when the eggs are soft and sticky.

B. Assemble in sandwich maker

5. Take a slice of bread and spread the egg on it.
6. Put the bread-with-egg-on-it on the sandwich-maker, then place a slice of cheese.

7. Get a new slice of bread, put it on the chesse.

8. Make another set, then start the sandwich maker.

Your sandwich will be ready in 4~5 min.

Menu 2: Grilled Cheese Sandwich

What do you need:

Same as Menu 1

How do you do it:

A. Make your french toast

1. Combine egg, milk, salt, pepper & chilli sauce.

2. Dip bread in egg mix.

3. Put it on hot buttered pan & let it cook on both side.

4. Repeat for another piece of bread.

B. Making the grilled cheese sandwich

5. Take a piece of the french toast.

6. Put a piece of cheese on top of it.

7. Then layered another french toast.

8. Tekan sikit the layered toast till you can see that both of the toast are sticking together by the melting cheese.

9. Your sandwich is ready.

You can also have your leftovers chicken, lamb as the fillings for the sandwich.

I did prepared chicken slices that I bought from the supermarket. It just need to be cooked and flavored with pepper and mustard. I also add a dash of tabasco sauce and herbs like coriender leaves or rosemary. It's a little bit different from the tuna sardines that we also prepared.

We also have chicken slices on mini bun instead of the usual rectangular bread.

I'll update more of our recipes later.

TTFN.

Hari Bapa 2009--> remembering Bapak pt 1

Assalamualaikum,

Sedih sungguh hari bapa tahun ini. Selalunya ibu akan awal-awal pagi telefon Wan. Ucapkan terima kasih atas segala kasih-sayang yang selama ini Wan curahkan pada kita semua. Tetapi tahun ini merupakan tahun pertama kita sambut hari bapa tanpa Wan. Terasa benar kehilangan Wan dalam hidup ibu. Tiada lagi panggilan telefon pada waktu pagi terutama kejutan untuk solat subuh pada hari minggu. Semuga ruhnya ditempatkan bersama-sama dengan para mujahidin, Ameen...

Let me tell you more of my father, but let it be in English..

Bapak was born in Alor Setar Kedah on 9/10/1936 to Shafie bin Saad and Andam binti Ahmad. He was the eldest of 9 siblings. He became a teacher when he was 13 (I was told that it was a norm for boys his age to work at that time). I was also told that Bapak sat for his SPM and STPM during his 'sekolah malam' and 'gaya pos'. He was offered to further studies in University Gajah Mada way back in the '60s, but he declined. Probably because of the young children and family that he need to leave behind. But that did not stop him from excelling in his career. He was promoted to become a headmaster when he was not even in his mid-30's. He was very much passionate in Malay Literature and politics. As far as I remembered, Bapak has always been somebody active in PAS Kedah. We had our fair share of in justice just because Bapak's involvement in PAS. Alhamdulillah, rezeki kita di tangan Allah.

Bapak loved to read. He will read from his start of the day (in the toilet) till he sleeping time. I discovered books all around us when we are still small. Going to the book store with Bapak when we are growing up was one of the best moment of my life (dia ada kerja kat Pej Pelajaran di Tingkat 2, so he will leave me at the bookstore at the Ground floor. Masa tu tak ada kes-kes anak2 kena culik, alhamdulillah. Dia pernah tinggalkan kami sebab dia terlupa!)

Another habit that Bapak has (until his passed away) is writing his journal. I dare not read his journals since I could not bear to read what he wrote about his feelings towards me especially related to my difficult years and towards the latter stage.( ni nak tulis blog everyday pun tak boleh...)

Did I mentioned that he wrote to me in Jawi when I was in the States? Yes... everyweek I'll received an aerogram from Malaysia from Bapak on news related to everything from Malaysia in Jawi. How I miss his surat....

He liked my cookings especially the Asam Pedas. For him, the best gulai ikan is from Mak, but I make a mean asam pedas. He will have seconds everytime I cooked asam pedas.

I hope I make him proud, regardless the pain that put him with my marital situation. It's not that I do not want to share the pain with him, it's just that I do not want to bother him with my issues especially bila dah besar2 ni. For him, I plainly forget about him. For me, I want to spare him from my issues. I am a little bit embarrased with all the hu-ha2. I know he loved me very much that he want to be involved in everything. I guess he really loved me very much.

I need to break from this entry... my tears are rolling now...

I'll put up the 2nd part of this topic....

TTFN.

Pening Kepala (or is it Pusing Kepala?)

My head is spinning again. Last 2 weeks, I was having the same issue! According to the Dr., my blood pressure was on the lower side. He prescribed Ginko and Visograin for the dizziness & mild migrain attack. Argh... since last night my head is throbbing like someone is knocking on it! I need to also get my eyes check... old age is catching up... real fast!.

Hope for Allah forgiveness for all the deeds....

P/S: the evaluation need to take a back seat today. Tak lalu nak tengok the table...

Bising dalam Mussolah!

I am so pissed of yesterday!!! Susah betul nak concentrate in my solat if there are a couple of people chit-chatting in the prayer room like they own the place! Hey kawan... this is a place wher you want to meet the ONe. You need all the composure to meet your Kekasih. This is the only place where you need all your concentration to meet the Creator! But what happen???? You guys were talking,giggling etc... if whispering tu, we know that you know this is the sacred place! but to talk like you are in the cafe (well a little lower than cafe...) Argh... and mostly are officers --> graduates (or at least someone that finished school!!!)

How to handle this kind of situation???

Birthday Dinner & Card

My dear anak-anak,

Thank you for the card & the potpurri. Thanks also for the dinner that we had at Delifrance Kota Kemuning. I wish the really served the French loafs like the one that I had in Paris.... but still your company topped everything else.

We had Ratatuille (argh spelling!) and their Chicken Teriyaki.

Thanks again.

Ibu.

Happy Birthday to Me!

Today is my 43rd birthday, this will mark the first birthday without Bapak. I don't expect anything anymore. If he is still around, he'll be the first to wish me the many happy returns. But now, I can only look back and reminisence about all the things that he did to us and for us.

Sarah wished me Happy Birthday with a peck on my cheekand a smile this morning. Then came SMS from En. Shamshul & CT + Emak.

Guess my birthday will come and go from now on.

I wish that Allah bestow me my health (and wealth). Limpahkan juga anugerah itu to my mother, my children and the rest of my siblings & their children. Permudahkan pembelajaran anak-anak. Please let Sarah score her PMR and get her to boarding school. Make us more devout Muslim than before. Amin ya rabbal alamin.